First time for many firsts now.

First time for many firsts now.
Went to the ER for the first time for me, my foot is all jacked have to stay off it for about a week. Kinda scary and kinda annoying, jus to go and nothing serious but serious enough to go. One of the things to miss not having my Mom around. I see finally how difficult it is. I guess i have to learn to let go and move on, but sometimes letting go is hard. You think everything is fine and then realize its not and everything just seems a lot tougher than it should. So many memories to hold on to, and some that should let go.
Today should of been a good day for football, but we didn't have it in us. I wish i wasn't hurt, maybe i shouldn't of played make it worse. We beat ourselves, and I blame myself for not leading/coaching the team better. Always next week, but today hurts more than it should. I blame myself ofr many things in life, and wish i could change or handle differently.